Meghan Trainor’s 19050’s style music video entitle “Dear Future Husband” has been divisive to say the least, and at first, I wasn’t quite sure how to feel about it. Yes, it is absolutely sexist, but perhaps it’s ironic? Maybe she’s making a statement about traditional gender roles and the video is supposed to be funny since everything is so different now? Right? Maybe?
I was allowing myself to feel conflicted, to give her the benefit of the doubt, until I read that she does not consider herself to be a feminist and that she told Time that “she deserves a good guy to take [her] out on a date.” Now, don’t get me wrong. She probably does deserve a good guy to take her out on a date. The problem is that she seems to believe she “deserves” it because she’s a woman. Full Stop. She seems to believe that women must be taken care of and told we’re beautiful and placated for no other reason than that we are females. That we are helpless on our own and that we are of no value and that we are not beautiful unless we have a man to tell us — every night — otherwise. Umm… nope. Disagree. Dear Meghan Trainor — you are setting women back.
So… now that I’ve realized this video is probably not satirical, let me list the top five ways it is sexist and perpetuates tons of negative stereotypes about women: 1. all women want to get married. 2. we want to get married *to a man*. 3. we reserve favors (like sex or buying groceries) for when “our men” do something good for us in return. 4. we expect men to always say we’re right *even when we’re crazy* (ughhh didn’t I JUST talk about women being emotional and how that’s not the same as being “crazy!”?!) 5. being a good wife means wearing tight outfits and looking super sexy while scrubbing the kitchen floor. Oh dear.
This song is sexist. But I will be damned if I don’t admit how catchy it is.